Jaandlu Writings

Staring Down the Barrel of a Gun

By MR Andlu

I was staring down the barrel of a gun when I realized I never saw it the first time. Not with such clarity. Not directly down the barrel, not the first time.

“This bullet’s got your name on it.” He said. That night was different. The name would have had James not Jason on it. What a cheesy comment I thought. What a stupid move.

“Put the gun down Jake,” I said, “unless you intend to shoot us. We don’t need any accident’s.” I was calling his bluff but I wasn’t afraid. My friend even commented latter how brave that was. It wasn’t.

The guy was being macho, trying to scare us. But I knew something he wasn’t smart enough or sober enough to remember. We were sitting in his parent’s garage, his parents asleep upstairs. He had already let that slip so at the site of the gun I didn’t even flinch.

Stupid early twenty’s that’s all I’m saying about that.

Now I’m looking at mug shot’s of the known criminals in this area and I’m realizing I didn’t stare down the barrel of the gun the first time. Funny it should come to me now, so long after the robbery of the yoga studio. Who the fuck would rob a yoga studio?

Y: Do U like pie J?
J: I like pie Y.
Y: Do U like pie G?
G: I like pie Y.
J: Do U like pie u
Y: ?
J: Y
Y: Yes
Y: Yes J * Taps foot impatiently *
J: Do you like pie Y I meant “Do you like pie Y” the u was a typo. I suck at typing.
Y: I LIKE PIE!
J: oh crap more cutomers coming in the back. I’ll be right back…
Y: mmm Pie
G: mmm Pie
CU: You guys are so lame.

“Give me everything in the drawer” he said quietly, holding what in my limited knowledge led me to believe was a very big handgun. I did so quietly. He slipped off quietly. With him he took our $85.

It happened, I reacted. There were 10 people in the asana room. He can keep his $85 lousy dollars.

CU: Yeah but one day I plan on reading Bradbury.
G: Yeah right, you suck.
J: Sorry about that, just a small holdup but no one was hurt
Y: J what happened?
G: R U Ok J
CU: WTF?
J: I have to call the cops guys brb
Y: I hope he’s ok
G: me too.
CU: WTF?
Y: Where is he
G: he’s taking a while
CU: he’s probably on hold.
J: The banks get the FBI and the yoga studio gets jack shit!
Y: R U ok?
G: what happened?
CU: they won’t come down there?
J: Nope. Fine, he can keep the $85
J: assholes every one.
Y: Are you ok J?
J: I’m just pissed now!

I shook harder than I shook the day I got in a fight in high school. I shook harder than the time my girlfriend got in a car accident and I came up on a scene of twisted car and the Jaws of Life working furiously to save the

passenger of the other car. I shook harder than the first time, when I had only thought I had stared down the barrel of a gun.

Now I sit in a muggy office staring at mug shots of known criminals and you know what…all white guys with beards look the same.